The Cryptogram Read online

  DONNY: “You should get married.”

  DEL: “It would have to be someone nice.”

  DONNY: “We’ll find them for you.”

  DEL: “Would you?” (Pause.) Although we joke about it. (Sighs.) Do you want me to go and look at John?

  DONNY: He’s going to be alright.

  DEL: Are you alright, though?

  DONNY: Yes.

  DEL: I’m sorry that I didn’t find Robert.

  DONNY (simultaneous with “find”): … That’s

  DEL: I looked for him, but …

  DONNY: That’s al …

  DEL: I Didn’t find him. I suppose I thought that—in, you know, in addition to the things I said—that it wasn’t a good idea to have him come here. But what business is that of mine? (Pause.) None. None, really.

  DONNY: That’s alright.

  DEL: None at all. But I looked for him. (Pause.)

  DONNY: (Long pause.) Well …

  DEL: Worse things have happened, I suppose. (Pause.)

  DONNY: … mmm.

  DEL: It’s such a shock.

  DONNY: However much we …

  DEL: What?

  DONNY: I’m sorry?

  DEL: However much …?

  DONNY: We could have anticipated it.

  DEL: How could we?

  DONNY: He tried to tell you.

  DEL: What do you mean?

  DONNY: He gave you the knife.

  DEL: I don’t understand.

  DONNY: The Odd Gesture. (Pause.) Isn’t it.

  DEL: I don’t understand.

  DONNY: You don’t understand the Gesture?

  DEL: No.

  DONNY: It was his going-away present. (Pause.) Going away. (Pause.) Big German knife. His war memento. Do you know the Meaning of it?

  DEL: … meaning …

  DONNY: You know what it’s for.

  DEL: The knife.

  DONNY: Yes.

  DEL: (Pause.) To cut things.

  DONNY: I mean the specific …

  DEL: The specific purpose? No. No. I mean, no.

  DONNY: It’s a pilot’s knife …

  DEL: … yes. I know that …

  DONNY: If he was forced to parachute …

  DEL: Yes.

  DONNY: The pilot would use it to cut the cords. If his parachute snagged.

  DEL: Huh. If it snagged. On, on what?

  DONNY: On a tree.

  DEL: Oh, you mean when he landed.

  DONNY: Yes.

  DEL: Huh. (Pause.)

  DONNY: And that’s the meaning. (Pause.)

  DEL: … yes …

  DONNY: When he was forced to abandon …

  DEL: Yes. (Pause.) When he was forced to abandon his … (Pause.) He looked for safety, and the knife, it cut … It “released” him.

  DONNY: Yes. That’s right.

  DEL: … as any tool …

  DONNY: And he gave it to you.

  DEL: He can be very generous. Is that alright? To …

  DONNY: Yes. No. He can. (Pause.)

  … what am I going to do? You tell me. Yes. He could be generous. I don’t know.

  DEL: … he was opening a can. With it. And I said … actually, he saw me looking at the knife. And he wiped it. And gave it to me. (Pause.)

  DONNY: When you were at the Camp. Last week.

  DEL: That’s right—(Pause.)

  DONNY: Tell me what you talked about.

  DEL: What we talked about. In the Woods.

  DONNY: Yes.

  DEL: We talked about you.

  DONNY: About me …?

  DEL: Yes. (Pause.)

  DONNY: What did he say?

  DEL: How happy he had been.

  DONNY: Really.

  DEL: That’s what he said.

  DONNY: How can you understand that. (Pause.) How in the world …

  DEL: I’m so sorry.

  DONNY: Did you know he was leaving me?

  DEL: No.

  DONNY: Did you think that he was?

  DEL: No.

  DONNY: No? You didn’t?

  DEL: How could I?

  DONNY: … he didn’t …?

  DEL: No. He didn’t what …?

  DONNY: Give you a sign …?

  DEL: A sign. No.

  DONNY: How can we understand … how … men, you know. How … men …

  DEL: I’m going to tell you something.

  It’s funny for two grown men to go camping anyway. (Pause.) I don’t care. (Pause.) Huh. I was born a city boy. (Pause.) (He displays knife.) And now I’m a Forester. (Pause.) I’m a Ranger … did you know there’s a Fraternal Group called the Catholic Order of Foresters?

  DONNY: Yes.

  DEL: You knew that?

  DONNY: Yes. Sure.

  DEL: I wonder what they do. (Pause.)

  DONNY: Did you say he gave that knife to you when you went camping?

  DEL: Yes. (Pause.)

  DONNY: When the two of you went camping. Last …

  DEL: Last week. That’s right. (Pause.)

  DONNY: He gave the knife to you.

  DEL: Yes. He was opening a can of … (Pause.) Why? (Pause.) Why did you ask?

  DONNY: I saw it in the attic. When I went up there. To put the things away.

  DEL: (Pause.) What things?

  DONNY: When I took the camping things up. Last week. (Pause.) After your trip. When you came back.

  DEL: I don’t understand.

  DONNY: When you came back, last week, Robert and you.

  DEL: … yes …

  DONNY: From your Trip.

  I went up. To put his things away. And the knife was up there. (Pause.) It was already in the attic.

  DEL: Well, maybe he went up there first, to put it back.

  DONNY: … What?

  DEL: I’m saying, maybe Robert went there first to put it back. When we came back. When we came back from camping. (Pause.) I’m sure that’s what occurred. (Pause.)

  DONNY: You’re saying that he went upstairs to put it back.

  DEL: Yes. Because it was precious to him.

  DONNY: I don’t understand.

  DEL: It was a war memento. I’m saying that it was so precious to him that he went, and left the stuff … for you to put away, but went upstairs and put the knife into the trunk himself. (Pause.)

  DONNY: Then how did you get it? (Pause.)

  DEL: What?

  DONNY: How did you get the knife?

  DEL: He gave it to me.

  DONNY: I don’t understand.

  DEL: He gave it to me.

  DONNY: How could he give it to you?

  DEL: What?

  DONNY: You said he gave it to you when you were camping. (Pause.) How could he give it to you when you were camping, when it was here in the trunk when you both came back? (Pause.)

  DEL: There must be two knives. (Pause.)

  DONNY: I … I don’t understand.

  DEL: There must be two knives.

  DONNY: What?

  DEL: I bet if you went in the trunk to look right now you’d see. There was another knife.

  DONNY: Yes. No. Wait … When did Robert give the knife to you?

  DEL: I thought … isn’t it funny? I was sure he gave the knife to me while we were camping. I guess I’m mistaken. (Pause.) Huh. (Pause.) Unless, no … Huh!… I … I don’t know. (Pause.) It’s a mystery to me. Unless …

  DONNY: Wait!

  DEL: What?

  DONNY: He came upstairs. He came up. To the attic!

  DEL: Who?

  DONNY: I was putting the things away. He said. Yes. “Leave the trunk open.” (Pause.) He got it from the trunk. When you came back. He didn’t put it there. He went up there to get it. (Pause.)

  DEL: That could happen.

  DONNY: What do you mean?

  DEL: Well, that, that’s not so unusual.

  DONNY: What isn’t.

  DEL: … for someone to do that. (Pause.)

  DONNY: Did he do that?

  DEL: It’s possible. I think he did.
Yes. I think that’s. Um, that’s exactly what he did. I think. (Pause.)

  DONNY: Why did you lie to me?

  DEL: I didn’t lie. It was a slip of memory.

  DONNY: Why did you lie?

  DEL: If I did I assure you, it was, um, you know …

  DONNY: What?

  DEL: It was …

  DONNY: You didn’t go camping.

  DEL: Who?

  DONNY: You and Robert.

  DEL: That’s ridiculous!

  DONNY: You never went.

  DEL: That’s …

  DONNY: … Yes …?

  DEL: Be, because, be … what are you saying to me? Am, am I to be accused of this!

  DONNY: Of what?

  DEL: Well, that’s my point.

  DONNY: What did you do?

  DEL: I. Why do you say that? For godsake!

  DONNY: What did you do? I’ll ask Robert.

  DEL: You can’t find him!

  DONNY: What do you mean?

  DEL: He won’t tell you. (Pause.) Alright. (Pause.) But: I want to tell you something: I knew that I should not take that knife.

  DONNY: Why did you take it?

  DEL: Be, because he gave it to me.

  DONNY: Why? (Pause.)

  DEL: Huh. Well, that’s the question. (Pause.) That’s what you’d like to know. (Pause.) Isn’t it? Yes. So you could say, “Old Del, who we thought was so Loyal” … I know what you mean. Believe me. (Pause.) Believe me.

  DONNY: Why did he give the knife to you?

  DEL: You don’t want to know.

  DONNY: I do.

  DEL: Believe me, you don’t. (Pause.) To shut me up. Alright? There. Are you happy? I told you you wouldn’t be.

  DONNY: To shut you up about what? (Pause.)

  DEL: Because we didn’t go.

  DONNY: What?

  DEL: We didn’t go! Do I have to shout it for you …? We stayed home. What do you think? He’d traipse off in the wilds … with me …? To talk about life? Are you stupid? Are you blind? He wouldn’t spend a moment with me. Some poor geek … “Here’s my Old Friend Del …” You’re nuts, you’re stupid if you think that’s what went on. (Pause.) He used my room, alright? He said, “Del, can I Use Your Room?” Is that so weird? There. Now I’ve told you. Now you can sleep easier. I told you not to ask. Don’t tell me I didn’t tell you. (Pause.)

  DONNY: He used your room.

  DEL: That’s absolutely right.

  DONNY: Why? (Pause.)

  DEL: To go there with a woman. (Pause.) And now, and now you know the truth, How weak I am. How “Evil” I am. He said, “I have some things to do,” “I want it to seem like I’m gone.” I spent the week, I slept in the, in my, my nook in the library. In fishing clothes … and don’t you think that looked stupid! (Pause.) I … I, actually, I’ve been waiting for this. I knew that I should tell you. This is the only bad thing I have ever done to you. I’m sorry that it came out like this. Indeed I am. (Pause.) But we can’t always choose the, um … (Pause.)

  DONNY: Get out. (Pause.) Get out.

  (DEL exits.) (Pause.)

  (DONNY starts to cry.)

  DONNY: (Pause.) Bobby. Bobby. Bobby. (JOHN appears in bathrobe.) (Pause.)

  JOHN: Are you dead?

  DONNY: What?

  JOHN: Are you dead? (Pause.)

  DONNY: Why do you say that?

  JOHN (simultaneous with “that”): I heard you calling.

  DONNY: Go back to bed, John.

  JOHN: I heard voices …

  DONNY: … you should go back to bed.

  JOHN: … and I thought they were you. (Pause.)

  DONNY: It was me.

  JOHN: And so I said, “… there’s someone troubled.” And I walked around. Did you hear walking?

  DONNY: No.

  JOHN: … and so I went outside. I saw a candle. In the dark.

  DONNY: Where was this?

  JOHN: In my room. It was burning there.

  I said, “I’m perfectly alone.” This is what I was saying to myself: “I’m perfectly alone.” And I think I was saying it a long time. Cause I didn’t have a pen. Did that ever happen to you?

  DONNY: I don’t know, John.

  JOHN: So I came downstairs to write it down. I know that there are pens up there. But I don’t want to look for them.

  (DONNY goes to him and cradles him.)

  Do you think that was right?

  DONNY: Shhh.

  JOHN: Do you think that I was right?

  DONNY: Go to bed.

  JOHN: Mother? (Pause.)

  DONNY: What?

  JOHN: Do you think that I was right.

  DONNY: I don’t know, John.

  JOHN: I saw a candle in my room.

  End of TWO

  THREE

  Evening. One month later.

  The room is denuded. Various packing boxes are seen. JOHN is sitting on one of them. DONNY comes downstairs carrying a box. She puts it down and starts for the kitchen.

  JOHN: Where were you?

  DONNY: I’ll put the kettle on.

  JOHN (simultaneous with “on”): Where were you?

  DONNY: I went up for your bag.

  JOHN: The movers will take it.

  DONNY: There were some things I thought that you might like to have.

  JOHN: What things?

  DONNY: For the first few nights.

  (Pause.) Until the boxes come. (She starts into the kitchen.)

  JOHN: Mother.

  DONNY (offstage): … yes …

  JOHN: Do you ever think things? (Pause.) Mother …?

  DONNY (offstage, simultaneous with “mother”): What? (Pause.) What, John? (DONNY reenters.) What did you say?

  JOHN: I asked you. Do you think things.

  DONNY: What things, John? (Pause.)

  JOHN: Do you ever wish that you could die? (Pause.)

  DONNY: … do I wish I could die?

  JOHN: Yes. (Pause.)

  DONNY: I don’t know.

  JOHN: Yes, you do.

  DONNY: No, I don’t know, John.

  JOHN: Yes you do. You can tell me. (Pause.)

  It’s not such a bad feeling. (Pause.) Is it?

  DONNY: I don’t know.

  JOHN: Yes. You do. (Pause.) I think you do.

  DONNY: John: Things occur. In our lives. And the meaning of them … the meaning of them … is not clear.

  JOHN: … the meaning of them …

  DONNY: That’s correct. At the time. But we assume they have a meaning. We must. And we don’t know what it is.

  JOHN: Do you ever wish you could die?

  (Pause.) Would you tell me?

  DONNY: Do I wish that I could die?

  JOHN: You can tell me. You won’t frighten me.

  DONNY: (Pause.) How can I help you? Do you see? (Pause.) Do you see?

  JOHN: No.

  DONNY: At some point … there are things that have occurred I cannot help you with … that …

  JOHN: I can’t sleep.

  DONNY: Well. It’s an unsettling time.

  JOHN: … I want …

  DONNY: Yes?

  JOHN: I would like to go to the Cabin.

  DONNY: … well …

  JOHN: I want to go to the Lake.

  DONNY: Well, no, John, we can’t. You know we can’t.

  JOHN: I don’t know that.

  DONNY: No. We can’t.

  JOHN: That’s why I can’t sleep.

  DONNY: What do you want me to do? John? I am not God. I don’t control the World. If you could think what it is I could do for you … If I could help you … (Sound of kettle, offstage.)

  JOHN: Do you ever wish you could die? (Pause.)

  It’s not such a bad feeling. Is it?

  DONNY: I know that you’re frightened. I know you are. But at some point, do you see …? (Pause. Exits.) (Offstage.) John, everyone has a story. Did you know that? In their lives. This is yours. (DEL enters.) And finally … finally … you are going to have to learn how you will deal with it. You u
nderstand? I’m going to speak to you as an adult: At some point … At some point, we have to learn to face ourselves … what kind of tea …

  DEL: Hello.

  JOHN: Hello.

  DEL: How are you today?

  JOHN: I’m fine.

  DONNY (offstage): What kind of tea?

  DEL: That’s good.

  DONNY (offstage): John?

  JOHN: What did my mother say?

  DEL: I came to talk to you.

  JOHN (simultaneous with “you”): … what did my mother say?

  DEL (simultaneous with “say”): She wanted to know what kind of tea …

  DONNY (offstage): John …?

  DEL: … what sort of tea you wanted. What sort of tea do you want? (JOHN rises to exit.)

  JOHN: I don’t know.

  DEL: I’d like to talk to you, John.

  JOHN: About what?

  DEL: Several things.

  JOHN: When is my father coming?

  DEL: I have something that I’d like to say.

  JOHN: I have to go upstairs.

  DEL: Could you wait a moment?

  (JOHN exits.)

  DEL: John …

  DONNY (offstage): Do you see? One has to go on. That’s all we can say. I’m speaking to you as an adult.

  (She enters, with a tea tray. Pause.)

  DONNY: Where’s my son?

  DEL: I don’t know. He went upstairs. (Pause.)

  DONNY: Mm.

  DEL: That’s right.

  DONNY: How is my husband.

  DEL: I don’t see him.

  DONNY: No …?

  DEL: I came to talk to you. And to the boy.

  DONNY: Well, it seems that he’s gone upstairs.

  DEL: Aha.

  DONNY: What do you need to say? (Pause.)

  DEL: I’m sorry what I did. (Pause.) Aren’t we a funny race? The things we do. (Pause.) And then what we say about them. You’d think, if there were a “Deity” we would all burn. (Pause.) Swine that we are. But we go on. (Pause.) I brought something for you.

  DONNY: You did?

  DEL: (Produces book.) As you see.

  DONNY: And that’s supposed to put you back in my good graces?

  DEL: What would do that?