The Cryptogram Page 5
DONNY: Nothing you’ve brought.
DEL: Well. (Pause.) Here is a book. It’s your book, by the way. I’ve kept it. All these years. Perhaps that’s what rotted my soul. Do you know, they say: it is not the sins we commit that destroy us, but how we act after we’ve committed them. Is that a useful bit of lore? (Pause.) I’ve found it so. (Pause.) And here is the German Pilot’s Knife. I was obsessed to bring it. I thought, “But why would she want it?” But, of course, it’s not for you. It’s a propitiation. To the boy.
DONNY: To the boy …
DEL: Yes. Well, he should have it. Shouldn’t he?
DONNY: Should he?
DEL: Yes.
DONNY: Why?
DEL: Because I’ve wronged him.
DONNY: You’ve wronged him.
DEL: I have.
DONNY: Haven’t you wronged me?
DEL: What was I going to bring you, Flowers?
DONNY: But you brought the boy the knife.
DEL: That’s right.
DONNY: No, you puzzle me.
DEL: I don’t deserve it. It’s his father’s, um, what do they call it? “War” memento. A “combat” trophy. I brought you the bbb …
DONNY: … it’s not a “combat” …
DEL: I brought you the book …
DONNY: It’s not a combat trophy.
DEL: Well, well, it’s a War memen …
DONNY: It’s not a Combat Trophy.
DEL: Whatever it is.
DONNY: It’s not …
DEL: Alright. He won it in the War. I didn’t want to deprive the boy of …
DONNY: He didn’t win it in the war.
DEL: Really.
DONNY: No.
DEL: No. The German Knife.
DONNY: No.
DEL: Well, of course he did.
DONNY: Not in the “fighting.”
DEL: Oh. He didn’t …?
DONNY: No. Not in the “fighting.” No.
DEL: He didn’t get it in the fighting.
DONNY: No.
DEL: Well, yes, he did.
DONNY: How could he?
DEL: Well, you tell me. How could he not? It’s a war mem …
DONNY: He was a flier. Do you see?
DEL: No.
DONNY: He was a flier.
DEL: I don’t see.
DONNY: He was in the air. Could he capture the knife in the Air?
DEL: I don’t understand.
DONNY: Could he get it in the Air? You “fairy”? Could he capture the knife from the other man in the Air? You fool.
DEL: (Pause.) Then how did he obtain it?
DONNY: How do you think?
DEL: I don’t know.
DONNY: But how do you think?
DEL: I don’t know. That’s why I ask.
DONNY: He bought it.
DEL: He bought the knife.
DONNY: That’s right.
DEL: The Combat knife.
DONNY: Mm.
DEL: … he gave me.
DONNY: Yes.
DEL: Where?
DONNY: From a man. On the street. In London.
DEL: Huh. (Pause.) You’re saying he bought the knife. And you thought that would hurt me. (Pause.) And you’re right of course.
DONNY: … to hurt you.
DEL: Well, you knew it would.
DONNY: Why would that hurt you?
DEL: Oh, you didn’t know that.
DONNY: No.
DEL: Then why did you say it?
DONNY: I …
DEL: Why did you say it, then? Excuse me, that the souvenir that he gave me, as a War Memento, with “associations,” that it had no meaning for him. And what would I know about the war? I live in a Hotel. (Pause.)
DONNY: I didn’t mean to hurt you.
DEL: Oh, if we could speak the truth, do you see, for one instant. Then we would be free. (Pause.) I should have chucked it anyway. (Pause.)
How could a knife be a suitable gift for a child? No, but we know it can’t. We bring our … our little “gifts.” And take your book. It’s your goddam book. I’ve had it at the hotel. All these years. I borrowed it and never brought it back. How about that. Eh? Years ago. That’s how long I’ve had it. Was ever anyone so false? Take it. I hate it. I hate the whole fucking progression. Here. Take the cursed thing. (Hands her the book.)
DONNY: It’s your copy.
DEL: It is?
DONNY: Yes.
DEL: How do you know?
DONNY: It’s got your name in it. (Pause.)
DEL: Where? (She shows him.) (Of book.) This is my copy … isn’t that funny? (Pause.) Because I’d wondered what I’d done with it. Do you know how long I’ve been looking for this? (Pause.) (Reads.) “May you always be as …”
DONNY: Aren’t you funny.
DEL: I’m pathetic. I know that. You don’t have to tell me. The life that I lead is trash. I hate myself. Oh well. (Pause.) But I would like to talk to you. (Pause.) If I might. (Pause.) In spite of …
DONNY: In spite of …
DEL: What has occurred. (Pause.)
DONNY: Why?
DEL: Because there are things. I have been longing to say. To, um … “say,” for a long … And perhaps this is what it takes. Isn’t it funny? If you’d permit me. Alright. Thank you. For a long while …
(JOHN appears on the stairs.)
DONNY: (Pause.) Yes? Yes, John …?
JOHN: I’m cold. I’m sorry. (Pause.) I’m cold.
My mind is racing. I …
DONNY: You what? (Pause.)
JOHN: … I think …
DONNY: … what can I do about it?
JOHN: I …
DONNY: What can I do about it, John?
JOHN: I don’t know.
DONNY: What do you expect me to do?
JOHN: I don’t know.
DONNY: Well.
DEL: … may I speak to him?
JOHN: I don’t, I’m afraid. I know that I should not think about certain things, but …
DEL (to DONNY): May …?
JOHN: … but I …
DONNY: John: John: I’d like to help you; now: you have to go to sleep. You must go to sleep.
If you do not sleep, lay there. Lay in bed. What you think about there is your concern. No one can help you. Do you understand? Finally, each of us.
JOHN: Where is the blanket?
DONNY: I … Each of us …
JOHN: … I want the blanket.
DONNY: Is alone.
JOHN: … the stadium blanket.
DONNY (simultaneous with “stadium”): I’ve put it away.
JOHN: No: Mother …
DEL: May I speak to him?
JOHN: I want it.
DONNY: I’ve put it away, John.
JOHN: I’m cold. Could I have it, please.
DONNY: It’s packed away.
JOHN: Where?
DONNY: A box. Up in the attic, I believe …
DEL (simultaneous with “believe”): It’s in the attic, John.
JOHN: I need it. I’m cold.
DONNY: John … Alright, now.
JOHN: I …
DEL (to DONNY): Perhaps he …
DONNY: It’s packed in a box.
DEL: But couldn’t he get it, though?
DONNY: No. It’s waiting for the movers.
DEL: But might he have it?
DONNY: It’s wrapped up.
JOHN: I could undo it.
DONNY: Fine. Then it’s in the attic. In the large brown box.
DEL: You see?
JOHN: Yes.
DONNY: With the new address on it.
JOHN: And I can open it. The box?
DONNY: If you will go to sleep. You must go to sleep. Do you hear me?
DEL: That is the point, do you see? John?
DONNY: You can unwrap it if you go to sleep.
DEL: … that’s right.
DONNY: But you must …
DEL: We’re talking to you like a man.
DONNY: But
you must promise …
JOHN: … I promise.
DONNY: … Because …
JOHN: I understand. I promise. (Pause.) I promise.
DONNY: Do you understand?
JOHN: Yes. Yes. I promise.
DEL: Good, then, John. Goodnight.
DONNY: Goodnight. (JOHN exits.) (Pause.) Lucky boy. To have a protector. (Pause.)
DEL: Well …
DONNY: Don’t you think?
DEL: Donny, I …
DONNY: Do you know. If I could find one man in my life. Who would not betray me. (Pause.)
DEL: I’m sorry.
DONNY: That’s what I mean.
DEL: I’m sorry I betrayed you.
DONNY: Isn’t that sweet. Aren’t you sweet. How could one be miffed with you? The problem must be mine.
DEL: I’m sorry I betrayed you.
DONNY: Just like the rest of them. All of you are.
DEL: I’m sorry.
DONNY: Can you explain it to me, though? Why? (Pause.) You see? That’s what baffles me. I try to say “human nature” …
DEL: … I know …
DONNY: I don’t know what our nature is. If I do, then it’s bad.
DEL: … I know …
DONNY: If I do, then it’s filthy. No, you don’t know. You have no idea. All the men I ever met …
DEL: And I’m so sorry. To have added one iota, in my stupid …
DONNY: … in this cesspool.
DEL: Could I …
DONNY: (Pause.) No. I don’t care anymore.
DEL: Could I talk to you? Who am I? Some poor Queen. Lives in a hotel. Some silly old Soul Who loves you.
DONNY: Oh, please.
DEL: No—I need you to forgive me.
DONNY: Why would I do that?
DEL: You should do that if it would make you happy.
DONNY: No, look here: don’t tell me I’m going to make a sacrifice for you, and it’s for my own good.
Do you see? Because every man I ever met in this shithole … Don’t you dare come in my house and do that. You faggot. Every man I ever met in my life …
DEL: Well, why does it happen?
DONNY: Excuse me …?
DEL: Why does it happen? Is it chance? Do you think it’s some mystery? What you encounter? What you provoke …?
DONNY: What I provoke …?
DEL: That’s right.
DONNY: What are you saying?
DEL: Well …
DONNY: You might as well say it.
DEL: Are you sure?
DONNY: Oh. Don’t “tease” me … mmm? For God’s sake: don’t “tease” me, lad …
DEL: … No.
DONNY: You came to say your little piece—go on.
DEL: Alright. For some time, for quite a long time I’ve watched you.
DONNY: Have you?
DEL: I have …
DONNY: You’ve watched me.
DEL: … and I’ve thought about you. And the boy. Quite a long time.
DONNY: Well …
DEL: Alright. Here is what I think: (Pause.)
(JOHN appears at the head of the stairs.) (Pause.)
DONNY: Yes. Yes, John, What?
JOHN: I …
DONNY: What? What? You promised. Did you promise?
JOHN: … I …
DONNY: … It’s not a small thing. You …
JOHN: I only …
DONNY: Yes, What? What? “You Only …” You prom …
JOHN: … I only …
DONNY: I DON’T CARE. Do You Know What It Means To Give …
JOHN: … I …
DONNY: … to give your word? I DON’T CARE.
JOHN: I …
DONNY: I don’t care. Do you hear? I don’t care. You promised me that you would stay upstairs.
JOHN: … I …
DONNY: I don’t care. Go away. You lied.
DEL: Donny …
DONNY: I love you, but I can’t like you.
DEL: Donny …
DONNY: Do you know why? You lied.
DEL: Let me … Let me … John: Here. Go to bed. Take the book. This is the book, John. We were talking about. It was my copy. It’s yours now. “That’s what the Wizard said.” It’s yours. Off you go. If you can’t sleep …
JOHN: … I …
DEL: F’you can’t sleep, you read it. It’s alright now. You go to bed. S’alright. Off you go.
(Pause.)
JOHN: I have to cut the twine.
DONNY: The twine.
JOHN: On the box.
DONNY: I don’t understand.
JOHN: To get to the blanket. It’s tied.
DEL: Alright, go to the kitchen, take, no, they’re packed. Are they packed? They’re put away, John. The knives are put away. (Pause.)
JOHN: You said I could have the blanket.
DEL: Well,
JOHN: You said that.
DEL: Well, you’ll have to do without. But you’ll be fine, I promise you. We’ll …
DONNY: Goodnight, John.
DEL: You understand. You’ll be fine. Goodnight, now.
JOHN: You said I could have the blanket.
DEL: Goodnight, Jjjj …
(JOHN starts to exit.)
DONNY: John? Del said “goodnight” to you. (Pause.) Did you hear him?
DEL: It’s alright.
DONNY: John …?
DEL: It’s alr …
DONNY: No. It isn’t alright. I’m speaking to you. Come back here. John? The man said goodnight to you.
Come back down and tell the man you’re sorry.
DEL: It’s alright, Donny.
DONNY: John? I’m speaking to you. What must I do?
DEL: Donn …
DONNY: What must I do that you treat me like an animal?
DEL: It’s …
DONNY: Don’t you tell me it’s alright, for the love of God. Don’t you dare to dispute me.
DEL: The child …
DONNY: Don’t you dare to dispute me in my home. Now, I’m speaking to you, John. Don’t stand there so innocently. I’ve asked you a question. Do you want me to go mad? Is that what you want? Is that what you want?
DEL: Your mother’s speaking to you, John.
DONNY: Is that what you want?
DEL: She asked you a question.
DONNY: Can’t you see that I need comfort? Are you blind? For the love of God …
JOHN: I hear voices.
DEL: John: Your mother’s waiting for you to …
JOHN: Before I go to sleep.
DEL: Your mother’s waiting, John. What does she want to hear?
JOHN: … before I go to sleep.
DEL: What does she want to hear you say?
JOHN: I don’t know.
DEL: I think that you do. (Pause.) What does she want to hear you say. (Pause.)
JOHN: “I’m sorry.”
DEL: What?
JOHN: I’m sorry.
DEL: Alright, then.
JOHN: You told me I could have the blanket.
DONNY: Goodnight, John.
JOHN: You told me I could have the blanket.
DEL: Yes. You can.
JOHN: It’s wrapped up.
DEL: Take the knife. When you’re done … (Hands the boy the knife.)
JOHN: I can’t fall asleep.
DEL: That’s up to you, now.
JOHN: I hear voices. They’re calling to me. (Pause.)
DONNY: Yes I’m sure they are.
JOHN: They’re calling me.
DEL: Take the knife and go.
JOHN: They’re calling my name. (Pause.) Mother. They’re calling my name.
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